Why Is The Incredible Hulk Not On Disney+

Okay, let's talk about something that's been bugging me. Where's the big green guy on Disney+? I mean, seriously, what's the deal?

We've got every Avenger practically living on that platform. Iron Man? Check. Captain America? Double-check. Even Hawkeye, who uses arrows, gets his own series. But no Hulk?

The Green Elephant in the Room

It's like having a party and forgetting to invite your most muscular friend. The one who could probably lift the entire buffet table with one hand. It's just…weird.

I get that there was that one movie, you know, The Incredible Hulk with Edward Norton. Maybe they’re embarrassed about that? (I actually liked it, don't @ me.)

But come on! Mark Ruffalo's Hulk is practically Disney royalty now. He's been in like, a billion movies. He even had that cute moment with Ant-Man.

Is it a rights thing?

Probably. I hear whispers of studio squabbles and complicated ownership agreements. Something about Universal still holding some of the cards.

It's all very grown-up and boring. I prefer to imagine it's something more dramatic. Like Hulk and Mickey Mouse had a falling out over a parking space.

Or maybe Hulk ate all the churros at Disneyland. Okay, that's more likely, right?

My Unpopular Opinion

Here's where I might lose some of you. I think maybe…just maybe…Disney+ is secretly afraid of the Hulk.

Think about it. Disney+ is all about wholesome family fun. Singing princesses, adorable droids, and…a giant, rage-filled monster who smashes things?

It doesn't quite fit the aesthetic, does it? I can already hear the cries of "But children love the Hulk!" True, but they love him in small doses. Controlled doses.

The "Smash" Button Problem

Imagine a kid accidentally pressing the "Smash" button on the Disney+ remote. Suddenly, your living room is filled with green explosions and the sound of terrified bystanders. Not ideal, right?

Maybe they’re worried about the potential for collateral damage. Both physical and…emotional. Let's be real, Hulk's temper tantrums can be a bit much.

It's like they're thinking, "Okay, we love having Hulk around for team-up movies. But do we really want him living with us? Leaving green footprints on the carpet?"

“Maybe Disney+ is secretly afraid of the Hulk.”

A Plea to the Mouse

So, Disney, I implore you. Let bygones be bygones. Sort out those rights issues. Get Hulk on Disney+!

I promise, we'll handle him responsibly. We'll only watch him when we're in a good mood. And we'll keep the remote far, far away from the children (and ourselves, when we're feeling particularly grumpy).

Just give the big green guy a chance. He deserves a place in the Disney+ family. And, frankly, I'm tired of having to explain his absence to my confused toddler. "He's...uh...visiting friends in another universe?" Doesn't quite cut it.

Do it for the fans. Do it for the children. Do it for the churros that need protecting! Just get the Hulk on Disney+ already!