The Legend Of Zelda Breath Of The Wild Awards

Hyrule's Got Talent (and a LOT of Awards)

Okay, let's be real. Breath of the Wild scooped up awards like Link scoops up rupees. Game of the Year? Check. Best Action/Adventure? Double check. But what about the real awards?

I'm talking about the categories they should have invented. The ones that truly capture the essence of Hyrule. Prepare yourselves for my completely unbiased (cough) list.

The "Most Creative Use of a Cooking Pot" Award

This one's a toughie. Are we rewarding the most disgusting meal Link managed to choke down? Or the accidental masterpiece created from random ingredients?

My vote? The guy who discovered that dubious food could actually heal you. That's some serious alchemy right there.

"Best Impromptu Weapon"

Forget the Master Sword. We're talking about the tree branches, the rusty shovels, the... chickens?

Seriously, someone needs to give the chickens of Hyrule an Oscar. Their kamikaze attacks are legendary. And mildly terrifying.

The "Most Unnecessary Shrine Puzzle" Award

Some shrines are clever. Some are challenging. And some make you want to throw your Switch into a volcano.

Specifically, any shrine involving motion controls gets my nomination. My wrists still haven't forgiven me. Nintendo, we need to talk.

"Best Korok Location (That Makes You Want to Cry)"

Okay, okay, finding Koroks is fun. 900 of them? Less so.

Especially the ones hidden under rocks on top of mountains during a thunderstorm. Seriously, who designed this game? A sadist?

"Most Effective Use of Link's Blank Stare"

Link doesn't say much. He just... stares. But that stare can convey a lot.

Think about the first time you met a Guardian. That blank stare perfectly communicates "Oh dear God, I am going to die." Award well deserved.

"The 'Why Did I Spend So Much Time Doing This?' Award"

We all have those moments. Staring at the cooking pot for hours trying to get a specific buff.

Chasing that elusive star fragment across the map. Collecting every single piece of armor. The struggle is real. And slightly embarrassing. My vote goes to perfecting shield surfing.

"Best NPC Who Deserves Their Own Spin-Off"

Hyrule is full of colorful characters. From Beedle the traveling merchant to Kass the Rito minstrel.

But let's be honest: it's all about Kilton. The monster-obsessed dude is pure gold. A spin-off starring him is my dream. Or maybe Tingle? Nah.

The "Unpopular Opinion Award"

And finally, this award is for the brave souls who dare to disagree. My unpopular opinion? The story is...fine. It’s the exploration that truly shines. Fight me!

So there you have it. My completely subjective and slightly ridiculous list of Breath of the Wild awards. What are yours?

Let's all agree that Breath of the Wild is fantastic, no matter how many chickens we yeet off cliffs.