How To Play Porn Hub Intro On Drums

Okay, confession time. I was at this party last weekend, right? Super awkward, the kind where everyone's either glued to their phones or pretending to have deep conversations about artisanal cheese. Naturally, someone thought it would be a genius idea to bring out a guitar. Cue the collective groan. But then, amidst the usual "Wonderwall" attempts, this guy, bless his soul, starts playing something…different. People looked up. Heads were nodding. A few brave souls were even…dancing? It was the Pornhub intro. Played on an acoustic guitar. Hilarious, right? And it got me thinking: could I do that…on drums?

Turns out, the answer is a resounding YES. And you can too! (Don't judge me, we've all been there… you know, there). So, if you're looking to inject some unexpected (and potentially inappropriate) fun into your drumming repertoire, let's break down how to play the infamous Pornhub intro on the drums. Consider this your secret weapon for breaking the ice (or maybe just clearing the room, results may vary!).

Breaking Down the Beat: It's Simpler Than You Think!

The beauty of this little ditty is its simplicity. It’s basically just a few notes, repeated. We’re not talking advanced polyrhythms here, folks. Think of it as the gateway drug to more complex drumming...except the drug is internet culture. So, what do you need to know?

Understanding the Notes

First, let's get the notes straight. If you’re not musically inclined, don’t worry! We’re going to keep this super basic. The Pornhub intro essentially revolves around four notes. Let's represent them with numbers for simplicity:

• 1 - This will be our root note, the foundation of the whole thing.
• 2 - A note a little higher than 1. Think of it as a step up.
• 3 - Even higher than 2. Two steps up from 1!
• 1 - Back to the root note. We gotta come home eventually.

Side note: I'm purposefully avoiding music theory terms here. We're not trying to become music professors, just annoy our neighbors in a unique and memorable way.

Translating to Drums: Where Does What Go?

This is where the magic happens! (Okay, maybe not magic, but definitely some rhythmic tomfoolery). We're going to assign these notes to specific drums in your kit.

• 1 - Bass Drum (The Boom!) – This gives it that deep, driving feel.
• 2 - Snare Drum (The Crack!) – Adds a nice, sharp accent.
• 3 - High Tom (The Higher Tone!) – This gives it that recognizable melody.
• 1 - Bass Drum (Back to the Boom!) – Completing the loop!

So, essentially, you'll be playing:

Bass Drum - Snare Drum - High Tom - Bass Drum

Repeat. Ad Infinitum. Until someone throws something at you. (Just kidding… mostly).

The Rhythm: Keeping It Steady

Now for the rhythmic pattern. This is where it gets a tiny bit more complicated, but still totally manageable. We're going to play these notes in a specific rhythm. Think of it as four equal beats in a bar. A simple 4/4 time signature.

So, imagine counting to four:

1 - 2 - 3 - 4

Each of those numbers represents a beat. And each of those beats will have one of our drum hits on it.

Therefore, it'll be like this:

Bass Drum (on 1) - Snare Drum (on 2) - High Tom (on 3) - Bass Drum (on 4)

Got it? Good. Now, let's put it all together!

Putting It All Together: Practice Makes…Acceptable

Okay, deep breath. It's time to actually try this. Here's a step-by-step guide:

1. Start Slow: Seriously, don't try to be a rock star right away. Begin at a slow, comfortable tempo. Think of it as a gentle simmer, not a roaring boil. Use a metronome (there are tons of free apps) to keep your timing consistent.
2. Isolate the Parts: Practice each drum hit individually. Get comfortable with the feel of the bass drum, the snare, and the high tom. Make sure your hands and feet are coordinated.
3. Gradually Increase Speed: Once you can play the pattern consistently at a slow tempo, gradually increase the speed. Don't rush it! Accuracy is more important than speed.
4. Add a Hi-Hat: To make it sound even more like the original (and to give it some more groove), add a consistent hi-hat beat. You can play it on every beat (four hi-hats per bar) or on every other beat (two hi-hats per bar). Experiment and see what sounds best to you.
5. Experiment with Dynamics: Don't just play everything at the same volume. Add some variation by playing some notes louder than others. Try accenting the snare drum or the bass drum.
6. Record Yourself: The best way to improve is to record yourself playing and listen back. You'll be surprised at what you notice (or don't notice) when you're actually playing.
7. Embrace the Silliness: Remember, this is supposed to be fun! Don't take yourself too seriously. Embrace the absurdity of playing the Pornhub intro on drums.

Pro-tip: Youtube is your friend! Search for drum tutorials that cover basic 4/4 beats and drum fills. It will help you feel the rhythm more comfortably.

Advanced Techniques (If You're Feeling Brave)

So, you've mastered the basic beat? Congratulations! You're officially a… well, a drummer who can play the Pornhub intro. Now, let's take things to the next level. (Disclaimer: Proceed with caution. These techniques may result in spontaneous applause or horrified stares).

Adding Fills

Drum fills are short, rhythmic patterns that break up the monotony of a repeating beat. They're like little bursts of energy that add excitement and interest to the music. Here are a few ideas for adding fills to the Pornhub intro:

• Simple Snare Fill: Try playing a quick roll on the snare drum at the end of every four bars.
• Tom-Tom Fill: Use all the toms on your kit to create a descending or ascending fill.
• Crash Cymbal Accent: Hit a crash cymbal on the first beat of every four bars to add a dramatic effect.

Varying the Hi-Hat Pattern

Experiment with different hi-hat patterns to add more texture and complexity to the beat. Here are a few ideas:

• Open Hi-Hat: Open the hi-hat slightly on certain beats to create a "splashy" sound.
• Hi-Hat Chokes: Close the hi-hat quickly after opening it to create a short, staccato sound.
• Ride Cymbal: Switch from the hi-hat to the ride cymbal for a different tone.

Adding Ghost Notes

Ghost notes are very quiet, subtle notes that are played on the snare drum. They add a sense of groove and complexity to the beat without being too overpowering. Try adding ghost notes on the off-beats (the "and"s) between the main snare drum hits.

Creating Variations

Don't be afraid to experiment with different variations of the basic beat. Here are a few ideas:

• Double Bass: For those with a double bass pedal, try incorporating it into the beat.
• Different Toms: Use different toms for the "3" note to create different sounds.
• Cowbell: (Because why not?)

Important Note: Don't go overboard with the advanced techniques. The key is to add subtle variations that enhance the beat, not overwhelm it. Remember, less is often more.

When to Unleash Your Inner…Drummer

Now, the crucial question: when is it appropriate to unleash your newfound talent upon the world? This requires some careful consideration. Here are a few scenarios to consider:

• Jam Sessions: This is probably the safest bet. If you're jamming with other musicians, the Pornhub intro can be a fun and unexpected way to break the ice (or annoy your bandmates, depending on their sense of humor).
• Parties: Use your judgment. If the party is full of open-minded, slightly intoxicated individuals, it might be a hit. If it's a stuffy corporate event, probably not the best idea.
• Talent Shows: This could be hilarious…or disastrous. Weigh the risks and rewards carefully. (Maybe get written permission from the venue first?)
• Your Own Band's Setlist: This is a bold move. If your band is known for pushing boundaries and being unconventional, it might work. But be prepared for some raised eyebrows (and possibly a band meeting).
• Silent Meditation Retreat: Definitely not. Just don't.

Ultimately, the decision of when to play the Pornhub intro on drums is up to you. Just remember to be mindful of your audience and the context of the situation. And always be prepared for the possibility of a mixed reaction. After all, that's part of the fun!

Final Thoughts: Embrace the Rhythm, Embrace the Absurdity

So there you have it. A comprehensive guide to playing the Pornhub intro on drums. Hopefully, this has inspired you to embrace your inner drummer (and your inner… well, you know). Remember, drumming is all about having fun and expressing yourself. And what better way to express yourself than by playing a ridiculously catchy and slightly inappropriate internet meme on the drums?

Now go forth and make some noise! (And maybe apologize to your neighbors in advance.) Happy drumming!

P.S. If you record yourself playing the Pornhub intro on drums, please send me a link. I'd love to hear it! (And maybe use it as inspiration for my next drum tutorial…)